Saturday, April 07, 2007 @ 10:06 PM
i'm tired as usual.
hais. took h3 test on wednesday. and i'm going to flunk my h3. first time in my whole life i felt so hopeless and frustrated doing a paper. i was pretty affected by that. if i didnt study, i can say it's okay. but the problem lies in i did study and i study pretty hard too. so what's wrong with me? i always felt it's worthless feeling sad over examinations. but i spend a lot of time to study for that. and why do i not know how to do? my mind was in a blank and my head just hurts when it shouldnt be. arrg. yup. and i heard that everyone says it's okay and easy. so something must be wrong right....but i dont know what's wrong. things didnt help when some guys tried to ask for my number when i was walking home after the paper carrying loads of stuff from career fair(god knows why i take them anyway). so anyway, i just gave them a cold stare.
but anyhow, i wont let a failure upset me. life is not about never failing, but in rising everytime you fall.
my friend gave me a hand made birthday card. i felt so guilty upon seeing it. some words from the card " i dont expect anything from you. i know you are busy. but i can still sense your kindness and sincerity, you know? " i was like OMG. i'm touched by yet feel terribly bad. she treat me like a real jiejie(sister), always sending me cards....yet, i always give her late replies. and i didnt give her anything for her birthday this year as i couldnt really walk after falling during the duathlon to buy her a gift. and when she came to my house, i was so tired that i fell asleep instead of keeping her company.
i dont believe i'm that kind and sincere person like she says....